“If I did not simply live from one moment to another, it would be impossible for me to be patient, but I only look at the present, I forget the past, and I take good care not to forestall the future.”- St. Therese of Lisieux
I’ve always had issues with looking and dwelling on the past. Especially when being sick, I constantly am looking at old pictures of when I looked healthier and better, or when I was actually happy. I don’t know why I do it, cause all it does it make me depressed. I look back when times seemed better and wish I was back.
I have a lot of anxiety problems, mostly because of my illness and health right now, but another huge contributor is the future. I am always worried about what is going to happen. It gives me anxiety when I eat something and then I worry about if it will make me feel sick. It makes me anxious thinking about my future life and career and what I should do. It makes me anxious when I think about my health in the future. I’m one of those people that even if my chest hurts a little bit, my mind jumps to “oh well, that’s it, I’m about to die of a heart attack.”
St. Therese teaches us how we need to not dwell in the past, or worry about the future. The most important thing to do right now is to be aware of what’s happening in the moment. We shouldn’t worry about the future, until that future becomes the present. I love how she says in order for us to be patient, we must live from one moment to the other. I wish I was more patient than I am, and I am constantly praying for God to help me improve. I think it all goes back to how I struggle with being present, and how I am either in the past or future. I look up to St. Therese in this moment and aspire to live how she does. I feel like if I live in the way she did, it will not only help me become more patient, but also help me be more happy with where I am at in my life. Also, I feel like I will be able to be there for the little moments that I would have otherwise missed by not being present. By taking in life moment by moment and day by day, I will be more accepting of myself and of my life.
My Little Way 